The Friday Funnies – You Can’t Make This Stuff Up Edition

Friday Funnies jpg
• You Can’t Make This Stuff Up
(Hat tip: “B-Squared”)

You Can't Make This Stuff Up

• Wedded Bliss
(Photo via “B-Squared,” text via “Ol’ Petrol Head”)

#1 Cause

Marriage shotgun

•    •    •    •

Would You marry Again? – Priceless

A husband and wife are sitting quietly in bed reading when the Wife looks over at him and asks the question….

WIFE: “What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?”

HUSBAND: “Definitely not!”

WIFE: “Why not? Don’t you like being married?”

HUSBAND: “Of course I do..”

WIFE: “Then why wouldn’t you remarry? ”

HUSBAND: “Okay, okay, I’d get married again.”

WIFE: “You would?” (with a hurt look)

HUSBAND: (makes audible groan)

WIFE: “Would you live in our house?”

HUSBAND: “Sure, it’s a great house.”

WIFE: “Would you sleep with her in our bed?”

HUSBAND: “Where else would we sleep?”

WIFE: “Would you let her drive my car?”

HUSBAND: “Probably, it is almost new.”

WIFE: “Would you replace my pictures with hers?”

HUSBAND: “That would seem like the proper thing to do.”

WIFE: “Would you give her my jewelry?”

HUSBAND: “No, I’m sure she’d want her own.”

WIFE: “Would you take her golfing with you?

HUSBAND: “Yes, those are always good times.”

WIFE: “Would she use my clubs?

HUSBAND: “No, she’s left-handed.”

WIFE: — stony silence —

HUSBAND: “Uh oh!”

00OO00

• Mafia Hit Man?
(Another hat tip to “B-Squared”>

Hit man?

• Blonde Joke du Jour

blonde jokes-sm

Two blondes traveled to San Franfreakshow. They headed to a pub close to the Bay and began drinking. They drank until they were thoroughly wasted and then decided to make their way back to their motel room.

When they exited the bar, a fog had descended on San Franfreakshow, and they could see at most only three feet in front of them.

At that point, the Mayor of San Fran walked up and was about to enter the bar. One of the blondes put out her hand and asked, “Can you tell us where we are?”
The Mayor turned to her and said, “Do you know who I am?”
The blonde turned to her friend and said, “We are in some serious trouble! We don’t know where we are, and he doesn’t know who he is!”

• Lawyer Joke du Jour

Shark-Attorney

Lawyer Joke du Jour

• Snark du Jour

Snark du Jour

… which segues to …

Yo' mama snark

• Separated at Birth
(For those of you who missed this at “Jerry Mander” )

SeparatedAtBirth

00OO00

This Week’s Walmartian!

walmart-logo

Walmartian

00OO00

• Freaks of Fast Food

Freaks of Fast Food

00OO00

The Continuing Series Series

• I Once Worked For This Guy

I once worked for this guy

• Why Women Live Longer Than Men
(Hat tip to “B-Squared” for the series)

Why women live longer than men

• Men In Need of Female Supervision
(Hat tip to “B-Squared” for the series)

Men In Need of Female Supervision

• Italian Translations
(Hat tip to “Joe P” for the series)

Italian translations

• How To Pose With Statues
(Hat tip to “B-Squared” for the series)

How to pose with statues

• Thank You, Steve Jobs, For These Devices
(Hat tip to “Penny AB” for the series)

Cell phones:Red Sea

00OO00

• Dawgznkatz

Karma

which brings us to
• The Swiss Reaper

Swiss Reaper

with that, until next Friday,

That-s-All-Folks

One Comment

Add yours →

  1. Kishan Thakar 11/12/2015 — 01:00

    Lol

    Like

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