Friday Funnies – Con, Descending Edition

Friday Funnies jpg

Hat Tip

A tip of the hat to “B-Squared” for the lead item.

con-descending

which segues directly to our
• Groaners du Jour

Why is it that we as a society have not developed more widespread education programs for donkeys and mules?
Because nobody likes a wise ass.

Why is that you can really never place your full trust a fajita, be it carne asada, shredded chicken, or chile verde?
Because they almost always spill the beans.

What might one call the first three digits of an opera singer’s cell phone number?
The aria code.

… closely related to the Groaners du Jour are the
• Puns du Jour

Geometree

Bach_in_the_saddle

… more groans, guaranteed by “B-Squared”:

S.Kimo

Resisting_a_rest

• Separated at Birth – Senator Diane Feinstein
(Hat tip: “B-Squared”)

Separated_at-Birth_Feinstein

… which somehow connects us to …
• WWLLTM – Why Women Live Longer Than Men
(Hat tip: “Ol’ Petrol Head”)

 

• Snark du Jour

Snark

Snark - Accomplishment-mouth-shuts

• Mexican Word of the Day

MWOTD-Juanderbread

which takes us directly to
• The Friday Funnies Food and Nutrition Corner

BFF_bacon_cheeseburger

Milkshake

Pet_Missing

Vegetarians_Animals_food

 

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… “Dr. Mc” brings us this 
• Important Neighborhood Watch Video 
(30 seconds)

 

• Lawyer Joke du Jour

Shark-Attorney

Hat tip to “Dr. Mc”, whose father was lead counsel for the prestigious law firm of Dewey, Cheatham and Howe.

All read from book called “Disorder in Court” and are things people actually said, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the responsibility of staying calm while the exchanges were taking place.

ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?

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This Week’s Walmartian

walmart-always-bad-service

Walmartian_right-place

The Walmart Car Show

Walmart Car Show-Dreamweaver

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• YJCMTSU

YJCMTSU

details

More News You Can Use:

Italian DNA

Electric cars

And now, in closing:

other-end-einstein

2 Comments

Add yours →

  1. Thanks again for the belly laughs. I didn’t laugh at the huge back hoe coming down the hill, but I did smile at the bottom! I have a friend who would have done that!
    THANKS again…. From the other coast!

    Liked by 1 person

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